You have been such a large part of my life for so long. There are days when I am so unsure of what to say to you; How to think about you with out saying thing that only bring me down, because nothing brings you down.
In order to be true to myself I have to tell you things that I am proud of. I am proud of the last six and a half years. How this burden has changed me as a person. I am proud of how many people I have been able to help through cancer. I am proud of the changes I have made in my overall health.
More than anything I am thankful for the relationships you have brought into my life. The joy that has come from those is worth way more than my health. These people have shaped my life into what it is today. The are the ones I go to for support and daily friendship. I am lucky to have them in my life for continued inspiration. These are people that spend their lives fighting to save lives or fighting for their own lives. I have made life long friendship with the family of those I have lost.
I look to them for comfort that if you one day beat me that they will be there to guide my family gracefully through my passing as I have watched them guide their own families. Creating traditions to remember lost ones. Creating joy around them and most of all stepping forward in the fight.
On day you won't be here anymore and it will because of all the people you touch that you won't be here anymore. You are building an army against yourself. Be ready they are coming for you.
I will always be thankful for you, but I will be more than thankful when you are no longer here to hurt my loved ones.