Sunday, June 27, 2010
Derivatives of the EEG technique include evoked potentials (EP), which involves averaging the EEG activity time-locked to the presentation of a stimulus of some sort (visual, somatosensory, or auditory). Event-related potentials refer to averaged EEG responses that are time-locked to more complex processing of stimuli; this technique is used in cognitive science, cognitive psychology, and psychophysiological research.
I had a EEG done this week, it is my second in the last month. I can't really explain to you the amount of anxiety this causes me for something that isn't that big of a deal. I hate when they decided to mess with my brain in ways that I cannot control. Secondly it is really weird deal, you go in and they set you in this super comfortable chair attach millions of little sticky things in your hair. Tell you not to sleep or eat before hand and want you to think you are going to have a relaxing forty minutes to sit. In all reality they want you to seizure or show signs of low or high brain activity. For me they look at my brain tumor and what kind of issue it is causing for me currently. They then compare this to my MRI and look for pattern that could show what kind of changes are taking place in my brain. They ask you to breath really fast, then they ask you to be calm, then suddenly they pull out the crazy flashing lights. Wow it is odd. Not a very enjoyable experience. The people are nice but, they are like the ones that draw your blood just kinda there. Not to mention they have this secret hope that you freak out I think.
This also creates fear for me. The fear of getting worse. I hate that they can track what is going on. Sometimes not knowing is something of a blessing because knowing can be horrible. I hate that some days I just don't remember anything some days, my body hurts and I just want to quit all treatments. I want to live a normal life where the doctor isn't a normal experience for me. I am grateful for the help of doctor, nurses and my now amazing family. I am grateful for the amount of comfort I get from blogging and reading other peoples inspirational stories. I am AFRAID of dying with out truly living.