Okay here goes... Why do I feel so worn down? I have lost so many of the other side effects: fainting, seizures, headaches... But it has been replaced by the want to sleep all the time. I forget everyday why I am SO grumpy. Then it flashes in front of me.. I am still in radiation. I am still get blasted EVERY day. No wonder I feel like this right? Then why is it so hard? Why do I feel like a prisoner of my own body some days?
As Sean goes to work out at the gym. I am home feeling guilty about it. I feel like I am letting him down. Getting fat and letting him down. I Know this isn't the reality but, I hear the disappointment in his voice when he calls and asks if I am coming and I say no.... Maybe it is my own guilt I hear. As my tummy grows more and more out of shape I grow more tired and lazy... LAME.