twilight.

Okay so for the most part I have HUGE issues with twilight. I hate the fact that my generation of people are going to be those know as the kids who loved sparkly vampires. For me that is a big no no. I don't want to be known as a generation that killed good romance. The movies are done with horrible acting and even worse side effects. Not to mention the fact that you can either be a vampire lover or a wolf lover and depending on who you choose mean that you get to have buttons, and shirt with their faces on them. So that the rest of the world knows what side they have chosen. I really can't believe my generation of girls are learning to masturbate to sparkly vampires. However, the books are not that bad. I started reading them after the first movie came out mostly just to find out if they were as bad as the movies. I really liked the books though. They are filled with morals, love, and reason not to be judgemental against those who are different from you. I am surprised that at how much I enjoy those things in the books I read. I wouldn't say that it is a must but, I am a little more into the book if it makes me feel better about be HUMAN.

It has been raining for days. It has been dark out side the last couple of days. I love the rain. It makes me feel clean and refreshed. I love the way the house smells when I open the windows. I love that the lilacs bloom when it rains. I love that I can taste the rain in the air. It is always amazes me when someone can look up at the sky and just know it is going to rain. I feel like I haven't paid enough attention to the world that I am living in. I try to give mother nature the most respect possible. Last year I saw a flash flood. The beauty of the rain is great powerful with force. I had never seen her in full movement. The extreme power and rage, then followed by ... peace.

I know you all must think I am obsessed with peace lately it is because I am. I a obsessed with the idea at feeling at peace. I want it back and I am going to continue doing all the things that make me who I am. I figure I will find it if I just keep doing what I am doing.

I have had moments of pure joy and pain this week. It has been a week of change and new experiences. Every one of them exciting and challenging. I am proud of myself for some of these changes in me. I am proud that I have opened back up my heart again for both pain and love. I am proud that I am saying all the things that I have never felt strong enough to say. I guess today I am proud.